Can people change? Jan 2 – Q & A a day

Hey, it’s Katherine! This question stumped me for a little while as to what to write. It is a question filled with hope and ideas for a better future and yet it is so grounded in our daily reality. I believe that people can under certain circumstances can in fact change. But it is always a choice, a conscious decision, that when made has to be worked at.

Our the past couple of months I have moved out of my mother’s house and I am now living in my fathers living room. It’s not all bad – I have a bed now! But over this time I think that I have changed a lot. It hasn’t been a dramatic transformation over three days: the kind you often see in movies. But a slower more gradual shift towards independence and adulthood. I have a lot more freedom at my father’s house than I did at my mother’s but that doesn’t mean the situation has changed in my favour.

My dad is not particularly emotionally intelligent. It pains me to say that on quite a regular basis I have to help this forty-something-year-old man with his love life and interpersonal relationships. I love him to pieces but I wish he could change.

I wonder if wishing that people could change is, in fact, more of a hindrance to the relationship you have with them. So often people will talk about their partners with so much joy and delight apart from that one little thing or maybe even the one big thing that they wish they could change. I believe in an 80/20 rule for almost everything in life. People will only be able to change about 20% over a given period of time you are kind of stuck with the other 80. I have certain standpoints about change which is that if you can’t change something then you need to accept it, and if you can’t accept it then you need to let it go. This rule is probably the best analogy I have for my relationship with my mother; she would not change to fit me growing up and I couldn’t change to fit her whims and wishes so we had to part ways.

I hope that at some point in the future we will both have changed enough to address our relationship as different people. But I can only hope.

Okay, that’s it for today, let me know if you think that people can change or if you have experienced people changing in your life.

Until tomorrow x Katherine x

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What is your mission? Jan 1 – Q & A a day

Hey, it’s Katherine! Sorry about the whole long-time-no-see thing. It’s been a bit mental the past couple of months and I thought I was getting back on track but apparently not. Oh well, you’re going to be seeing a lot more of me now.

I have been meaning to post more and share more stuff about myself and who I am as an individual and I thought that a really nice way of doing this would be with one of those 5-year Q and A journals. I don’t think I’ll be doing these questions for five years but we can start with one and see where we go.

1st January – What is your mission?

I have a couple of different missions going on at the moment so I’ll explain them all.

Writing

I want to write a lot more and create more content for this website and to expand my work for the Kingdoms of Ardor so that I am able to share more of that world with you. I want to become more dedicated to sticking to a tighter schedule and writing on demand rather than just when inspiration hits me.

Control

At some point, I’ll do a bullet journal walk-through and you can look at my page for my word of the year. This year I have chosen to have control as my word of the year. My life has gotten very complicated and quite out of hand recently and this year I want to be able to take back control of everything I am doing. I’m sort of splitting it down into more manageable section by having words of the month as well. January’s is organisation as this is a key area that helps you to stay on top of everything else.

God

This will probably sound quite cliche really. I am trying to get closer to God and my own spirituality and understand Christianity a lot more. I have a bible reading guide and I want to be reading the bible every day and learning to understand the word of God. I think like quite a lot of people, I have had a particularly rocky relationship with God and with Jesus. I am sort of trying to fix that. I plan on getting rebaptised at some point this year. I was christened as a child but a lot has happened since then and I think that some reaffirmation would be helpful.

School

I am in my first year of A levels and need to learn how to stay on top of everything and actually learn how to revise and work on myself as a student. I have always been fairly smart so throughout my GCSEs I didn’t need to try very hard to achieve the grades I did. A Levels is a totally different ball game and I need to really work a lot harder to get where I want to be.

Okay, guys and girls, that’s it for my missions this year. Let me know if you have any particular goals or missions for this year in the comments x

Until tomorrow x Katherine x